China's Perception of Beauty

Before each class, the same thing usually happens. Excited children peer at me from behind a wall or door and then run down the corridors shouting; ‘beautiful! Beautiful! So beautiful!’ The Chinese teachers who help me to control the class also comment on my appearance and youth.

If I had a pound for every time someone told be that I was beautiful here, I would be rich!

I’m not saying this to sound full of my self. The fact is, every foreigner in Asia will say that they have been told the same thing.

 The Chinese love fair skin, big eyes and being thin.

In China, when someone compliments you about anything, you must decline the compliment and produce a compliment of your own in return. So, for example, if a person says, ‘your Chinese is very good,’ you would reply saying, ‘no. My Chinese is not good. Your English is very good.’ If you say, ‘thank you’ to a compliment, you are seen as being arrogant and impolite. I didn’t know this when I first arrived. Oops!

At home, a lot of men will find big bums and big boobs attractive. Here, it’s all about having a pretty face. Girls here are thin and petite. Not once have I seen fake boobs and big bums. The girls here seem to concentrate on facial beauty more than showing off their bodies (unless they work in a club).

I find the Chinese girls so pretty with their naturally straight dark hair, near perfect skin complexions and their petite sizes. But naturally, some will find flaws in their appearances. I’ve had some Chinese girls tell me that they think that their faces are too ‘fat.’ Sounds pretty ridiculous right?

The Chinese girls also want fair skin. I was aware of this before I came here and although there is a variation of Asian skin colour here, pale is seen as being cooler and more beautiful than darker skin. Here is a picture of a Chinese actress, Liu Yan, to give you an idea of how pale some girls want to be.

Some Chinese girls focus a lot on what they look like and what they look like to others as any other girls would in any other country. One Westerner told me that he was at work and some Chinese recruiters were busy sorting out possible applicants for future job positions. When he asked how they were deciding who got hired and who didn’t, whether it was on the Universities they had been to or past experience, they replied saying that it was down to what they looked like from their application photographs!!

Beauty pageants in mainland China were banned for more than 50 years to try and limit the discrimination of women. But now, it is apparently quite popular among young women and it is something many dream of winning.

 However, when I ask my students what they want to do as a career, instead of saying; a singer, an actor, a model, a celebrity, they will say that they want to be a business man or woman. I find this refreshing.

When I talk with my older classes about differences between China and the West, I mention the different ideas of beauty. When I tell my students about British girls wearing fake hair, fake nails, fake eye lashes, fake eyebrows and fake tan, they always look at me with raised eyebrows and laugh.

I like to people watch and the girls here are usually very natural looking. Of course, some will wear make up, but I’ve never once seen an orange face or 8 layers of make-up on any girl.

I also find it very difficult here to guess a girl or a woman's age. I'm not the only one to have this difficulty either! Chinese women seem to have the super power of looking young for a long time! They will always look younger than they actually are! For example, the actress, Zhang Ziyi (from 'Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon' and 'Memoires of a Geisha') looks about eighteen but in actual fact she is thirty four!!

I’ve spent so long getting used to my ‘ginger’ hair. I spent my younger years being bullied for it and when I was older I was teased for it.

Now, I love my hair, it’s what gets me noticed. Less than 4% of the world’s population has my hair colour and less than 4% has my eye colour (green). Everyone tries so hard to be different and now I realise that I was different all along. So just when I am fully embracing my individuality and 100% happy with my appearance (well, 85%), the Chinese think that my hair is blonde!!...

Typical!! So I keep getting told how much they like my ‘blonde’ hair. It was the same when I lived in Italy. They described my hair also as ‘blonde.’ Typical!

I find different countries and cultures' ideas of beauty interesting. Everyone wants what they don’t have!

I have to say, I prefer the more natural look here rather than the faker look at home in the UK. I’m already wearing far less make up here than I would in the UK and I am going to try my best to keep it that way.

The Spring Festival is approaching...

On Sunday I went to my work’s New Year meal. I thought it would be just the foreign teachers and our bosses. I couldn’t be more wrong. We went to a hotel. I was asked to write good luck wishes to people for the New Year on red paper. I signed my name and got given a free gift (a set of chopsticks. Great! I can practise using them at home now!) 

I then got taken into the main room. It was full of tables and people….400 people in fact. The entire team from the 14 different schools were there! 

 Food was brought out continuously. I have to say, I still need to get used to Chinese food. It’s certainly very different to the Chinese food we get at home! I have yet to learn the names of Chinese dishes or know what is what! Also, I still have the same problem using chopsticks! So, attempting to eat food is always harder than it should be!

A week before the event, I was asked to do a performance at the meal. I said no because I was feeling unwell. I’m so glad I said no. I had no idea that I would have had to perform in front of over 400 people!!

Some children and teachers did some performances. I have to say, the whole experience was a bit strange for me! Five girls began the show. They are obviously teachers at the school and they performed a dance in little shorts and crop tops. It was a bit inappropriate for a teacher’s meal but I don’t think anyone would protest because they were attractive Chinese girls!

Next, some boys who were no older than ten years old performed some Chinese hip hop dances. At the beginning, I thought they were good. They were cute with interesting style and good moves. However, the second song came on and it had lyrics that included, ‘I’m going to shoot you’ and swear words beginning with ‘f’ and ‘s.’ Again, probably not the most appropriate song for a work dinner or for children! The foreign teachers looked at each other awkwardly, trying not to laugh. I looked around and it seemed the Chinese enjoyed it though!

Two more children came on stage and performed a dialogue. It reminded me of a performance from the Eisteddfod back in Wales. I think half the dialogue was supposed to be in English but I didn’t hear any!

Two male singers sang a song each. The first should stick to his day job. The other was quite a good singer and the Chinese kept offering him gifts for his singing. By the end he was singing with an arm full of wine, food and Baijiu, (the VERY strong alcohol that they drink here).

It seems Chinese people are immune to loud sounds. The microphones were SO loud the whole time. I fear my hearing is not so great now after that evening!

The meal was over as quick as it had begun. The whole event lasted about an hour! People were having photos and leaving before the performances had even ended! I was so surprised. I thought the New Year celebrations would go on all night! The foreign teachers wondered how much was spent on the event and that it was a shame the event ended so suddenly.

 The foreign teachers were the last to leave. The workers were taking down the whole display before we had even left and they were standing next to us impatiently while we finished our wine! I think that was them ‘subtly’ hinting for us to leave!

The Spring Festival (Chinese New Year to you and I) is fast approaching and people keep asking me what I’m doing for it. I have no idea!

 It seems boyfriends and girlfriends are going on holiday to places like Indonesia and Thailand. The Chinese return to their families. Foreigners go home.

Apparently the Spring festival is like Christmas…except it lasts over a week!! Everything is closed. I thought that maybe I could do some travelling around China, but travelling is impossible apparently. The roads, trains and planes are grid locked and even some hotels don’t do business.

What will I do?

 Even Natasha, my closest friend here is going on holiday with her mother. I am going to have to stock up on an endless supply of food and hope that some people will be around for me to socialise with! I will get at least four days holiday from work during this festival. I must not waste them!

This year is the year of the horse. I was born in the year of the horse so this is my year! I'm supposed to wear red every day to attract good luck. Supposedly, when it's your year, you will either get a lot of good luck...or a lot of bad luck. Let's hope this year is a lucky one for me!

The good and the bad

As expected, some children are good, others are not so great. When I was little, I was one of the good. I never spoke out of place, I was shy and I always did as I was told. Now that I’m the teacher, I know that those good children make the life of a teacher so much easier and better!

I have started giving stickers to the classes that behave well. Some classes are large (20 students) and others are small (as little as three in a class). However, a large class could behave just as well as a small class, depending on the personalities of the children.

I enjoy teaching well behaved classes the most for the obvious reasons; I don’t have to strain my voice, we can all have a laugh and I find that I enjoy my self as much as the children do.

Classes also have a mixture of good and bad children in the same class. I have yet to work out how to praise the good behaved children without causing the bad behaved ones to have tantrums.

The naughty children are always boys! I wonder why that is? These naughty boys are usually big for their age. (One large eight year old boy took a liking to me and proceeded to pick me up when I was writing something on the board. He was quite scary, even for an eight year old!)

A lot of the boys enjoy fighting each other. Once, two boys were fighting, and at the beginning, they looked like they were play fighting because after each hit they would laugh. However, the hitting began to get harder and harder and their faces turned angrier and angrier. I had to run in between them with their parents and stop them before it got too far! The parents didn’t seem bothered while I was stood quite alarmed! Later, the same boy from the fight would not stop talking while I was trying to explain a game. So I sent him to sit down and said he would not take part. He didn’t care. He just lay down on the floor and was laughing to himself. (A future pain in society no doubt!)

He has been the only child I have sent to sit down so far though. I’ve also had a nine year old boy hide under a table and cry like a wolf for much of a lesson. Some children are quite odd!

Some of the Chinese teachers are a great help and help me to control the class and make sure that they understand. Others are not so helpful. They will listen to their music or be on their phones.

I am also surprised at the difference in the levels of English among students of the same age but in different classes. Some classes are very intelligent and understand most things. Others struggle with even the basics. Sometimes it can be difficult to communicate with students that you know should be better than they are. Sometimes I wonder if they just pretend to not understand to be annoying!

I have a new student. She is only three years old and her name is Apple. She is now having one to one classes with me once a week. She has to be one of the most intelligent three year olds on earth! I’ve heard that China is home to very hard working and intelligent children and pushy parents. These are not pushy parents. These are parents who have seen how talented their daughter is and are trying to give the best head start to her education! This three year old has taught herself A to Z, body parts, animals, numbers 1 to 10, colours and songs like, ‘London Bridge is Falling Down’ and ‘Row the boat.’

 I repeat, she taught her self!!

There have been a fair few tears in my classes too. I am glad to say these tears are not a result of my teaching!! There have been a few accidents in my classes; children have trapped their fingers in doors (they seem to love playing with doors), they have fallen over (due to being silly) and have been too rough play fighting with each other. The children tend to get very excited with the presence of a foreign teacher and their behaviour can go over the top! I tend to their wounds the best I can and do what I can to put a smile back on their faces!

I am still really enjoying teaching. I get told that I’m good with the children and that I will be a great teacher. This makes me happy. I can’t see my self teaching forever, but I hope to continue teaching in the near future! 

Welcoming 2014 in China

For New Year’s Eve I usually spend it on Wind Street in Swansea or at home with my family watching Jools Holland on television and drinking wine. I’m not a huge fan of New Year’s Eve usually. If you go out, it’s busy, it’s expensive, no one seems to know where to go and it is always possible that you may spend the countdown in a queue or in a taxi.

This year I was glad to celebrate the New Year in a different place. My New Year involved no drama, no problems, no stress…just a lot of dancing!

Natasha had a head start, she had started drinking in her apartment while getting ready. Why didn’t I think of that? I’ve yet to work out what’s the best wine to buy here! We met some teachers at a bar. Unfortunately, we missed the live band because we took too long getting ready. (Typical girls!)

We did have difficulty deciding where to go. We tried a few different bars but they were all busy. For some reason, I didn’t expect the Chinese people to be out celebrating too! Everywhere was busy but not like it would be in the UK!

We eventually went to a bar and were given a table to sit at. The bar manager is a little in love with Natasha so we got ourselves a table easier than it should have been!

We got ourselves some cocktails and waited for the count down. John, another teacher had bought some Italian Prosecco and shared it between everyone at the table.

The count down was funny. I have only mastered 1 to 10 in Mandarin, so when everyone began counting backwards from 10 to 1 in Mandarin, that just confused me! I felt like I needed ten seconds in between each number to work out what came next!

After celebrating the New Year, the youngsters of the group decided to go to a club. We went to a club called V8. It’s a hip hop club and I was surprised to see a lot of young Westerners there. I didn’t get attention from Chinese people like I had in the other club I mentioned in my earlier blog! It was nice to feel as though I blended in a little, that I didn’t feel like I had ‘FOREIGNER’ written on my forehead!

The dance floor moved around in a circle. That was a shock the first time I stood on it. I wondered how I could be that drunk already before I realised that the floor was actually moving! The floor also felt like a trampoline. When people jumped to the sound of the music, I felt my self up in the air without making the effort to jump my self!

We danced the night away. It got to 3am and we were the only ones left on the dance floor. I grew tired and Natasha was the dancing queen and wanted to keep on dancing! We decided to go home.

As we left the club and waited for a taxi outside, for a brief moment, I felt like I was in Swansea again! To my left, there was a Chinese man passed out on the floor and stretched out like a star, a Chinese girl and boy were trying to lift him onto his feet to get him into a taxi and there was a random pile of clothes . To my right, a group of Chinese men were trying their best to walk towards another group of taxis. It must have been a difficult journey because it took them a long time to reach the taxis! There was also the unpleasant sight of where someone had been ill. The pile of clothes was a mystery because everyone was fully dressed near by. Where did they come from?

I smiled to myself. The Chinese would be challenging contenders against the Welsh when drinking is concerned.

I hope 2014 will be a good one for me, for my family and my friends!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Did you make any New Year’s resolutions? I have a couple…

• I must not forget that I’m in China!...Now that I have settled here a bit better, it’s time to be a tourist! I haven’t taken many photos of the city yet. I haven’t seen any tourist sights yet either. So it’s time to go exploring and see some sights!
• I want to learn Mandarin. (Not fluently! That’s impossible!) It would be nice to be able to understand some things though!
• I must not forget the Italian I spent four years learning at University! So I need to keep practising it somehow so that I don’t forget it...

 I wonder what welcoming the Chinese New Year will be like!...

My Christmas in China

Following up to Christmas, I confess, I wasn’t that excited. To be fair, there were decorations everywhere here. The Chinese love to decorate for Christmas so it wasn’t as though Christmas was totally ignored here. But I lacked enthusiasm because this was my first ever Christmas away from my home and my family.

I bought a few decorations I found in a supermarket and decorated my apartment with lights and little snow men.

I spent the morning of Christmas eve at a normal school. The private school I work for gives other schools a taster of English lessons by foreign teachers sometimes to encourage  parents to pay for extra English lessons for them.

It was a fun morning, there were 70 children between the ages of six and nine in each class and I had three classes that morning! So in one morning, I was in the company of 210 children!

Luckily I was accompanied by Daniel, a very experienced teacher who has been here for nine years and is used to teaching big groups of children. So I was more of a teaching assistant during the morning, choosing children from the crowd to participate in games, I handed out sweets to the winners and cheered them on.

I was so impressed by the children. They had memorised Christmas songs, they sang ‘Santa Claus is coming to town’ and had a dance routine for it. At the end of each class, a crowd of children would come running at me and Daniel. The first time, I didn’t know what to do. A crowd of 70 children running at you can be quite scary! But they threw gifts at us, offered us sweets, they gave us Christmas cards that they had made.

I was so happy when I left the school with a bag full of gifts. The gifts I had included some very thoughtful presents like sweets, a stocking, a ring, a snow globe and a mask. Some less thoughtful gifts included some half eaten packs of crisps and a few individual biscuits and crisps. But it’s the thought that counts of course!

During the evening of Christmas eve, I had hoped to go for some cocktails with Natasha to help me distract myself from the thought of being away from home for Christmas. Unfortunately, she worked late that night and then wanted to prepare for the TESOL exam that we had on Thursday morning. Therefore, I was on my own on Christmas eve.

I’m not going to lie that I didn’t feel lonely. I watched ‘Home Alone 2’ and ‘The First Snow of Winter’ to try and get into the Christmas spirit but I did feel sad.

On Christmas Day however, I felt my usual self again despite feeling a little unwell and me and Natasha went shopping in a big shopping centre. I asked a few Chinese I met what they do at Christmas and they told me that they go shopping! Christmas music was played in many shops and the decorations were lovely.

We went for lunch at a Japanese restaurant and then went home. I spoke to my family on Skype, which was such a great delight! Whoever invented Skype, I want to thank them so much for inventing such an amazing thing!

In the evening we went for a meal at an Italian restaurant with other teachers and their friends. I was the last to order and the first to get my meal! That never happens to me! By the time I had finished my pizza, Natasha waited another hour to get her lasagne! Poor girl! She had filled herself up with garlic bread and chips by the time it arrived!

On Boxing day, I was up at 6.10am!!! I had a TESOL exam and it took all morning! My cold had gotten worse and all I wanted to do was go to bed! Luckily, the exam went fine, I picked up a parcel that my family had sent me from home and I went home. Natasha (who speaks perfect Chinese) helped me buy vitamins and Chinese medicine from the Pharmacy. Without her help, I don’t know what I would do!

My parcel actually arrived on time, on Christmas eve, but I could only pick it up on Boxing day. I was expecting the parcel but what was in it was a surprise. My family had sent me Christmas cards and had wrapped up the gifts in gold wrapping paper. I felt so excited and I feel so happy and lucky to have such a wonderful and caring family. The parcel included things like; peanut butter, sweets, Chocolate Orange, Christmas cake, Christmas tree glasses that light up, gloves and Percy Pigs!

Christmas here in China was strange but it was an experience. I sometimes forgot that it was Christmas day and had to apologise when I forgot to say ‘Merry Christmas’ to another teacher. It has been strange teaching children about Christmas but not being able to tell them about any of the religious aspects of the occasion! So when the children think of Christmas, they must literally think only about Santa, presents and Christmas trees. They know who Justin Bieber, One Direction and Taylor Swift are but they don’t know who Jesus is!

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas! As usual, Christmas day has come and gone so quickly and now it’s nearly New Year’s Eve! I don’t know what I’m doing yet. No doubt I’ll be writing a new blog post on it soon!

My First Night Out!

Me and Natasha walked to a nightclub less than a minute’s walk from our neighbourhood. We met two teachers outside. They took us in. We were greeted by a team of ten staff welcoming us in, bowing and saying their greetings.

We were on the guest list. I heard loud Western music in the distance. The doors were opened and we were guided to our table.

A table just for us…and free drinks all night!! Why?...Because we were Westerners. We were a group of four Westerners. We were allowed free drinks all night and a personal waiter. If there had been three Westerners and one Chinese…we would have not been given the same service!

We put our coats in the coat room (every cloak room anywhere is free) and we began our night!

A girl no one knew came to our table. Her eyes widened when she saw me and clinked her glass against mine. If someone says ‘cheers’ to you in China, you have to down your drink. I’m terrible at downing drinks, but here it’s considered a weakness or even disrespectful if you don’t! So I downed my drink…then again and again!

 In China, people say ‘cheers’ a lot! In Western countries, we say it once at the beginning, but in China, they say it all the time. I mean ALL the time! So you always have to be prepared. Having an empty glass is not an excuse!

In foreign countries, I am used to guys giving me attention for my ‘blonde’ hair, pale skin and tallness but I am not used to girls!

Another girl came up to me and spoke Chinese. (No one speaks English here…NO ONE!) Lee, one of the English teachers translated for me. She said that her male friend invited me to their table for a drink. I went with Lee to try and get away from the clingy Chinese girl. She followed.

I drank a drink at the table and then the two girls progressed to almost argue about who go to be in my company! Two girls…disagreeing over who should be in my company!

(If a Chinese person is seen in company with a white person in China, whether you are a man or woman, the Chinese person is seen as being wealthy and with many connections. Therefore, the Chinese person’s friends will be impressed and they will respect them highly!)

So I had men and women talking to me all the time, asking for photos, clinking glasses with me and talking in a language I didn’t know!

Later, the clingy Chinese girl gave me her owl pendant. I knew it was impolite to refuse but I had to! She left it with me anyway! In Italy, owls are a sign of good luck…so I hope it will bring me luck! Lee eventually told the clingy girl to go away. She obviously took offence but five minutes later, we saw her gate crashing another groups table and stealing their alcohol instead.

I saw a lot of girls in little clothing. The girls who were dressed (like hookers basically) worked there. Mostly men in China earn lots of money so bars and clubs mainly target men to come and spend money at their clubs, hence the girls in little clothes!

A few times, the girls performed dances or sang songs for the audience. Some men that worked for the club also performed some dances. They danced to songs like 'YMSA' and 'Gangnam style.' A man sang some Chinese songs and dedicated them to me and a woman mimed to Lady Gaga and Rihanna in a really strange costume.

Then the Western/club music started once more! I loved it!...

…Until they started playing Chinese pop music! I obviously didn’t know any of it! But it made me laugh!

At home in the UK, boys wouldn’t be seen dead on the dance floor if there were no girls and no decent music (unless they were very drunk)…but at one point here I even saw straight Chinese guys dancing in a circle holding hands for a short while!!!

More than once there were circles of Chinese boys and girls who got me in the middle and took it in turns to dance with me! They seemed so happy to have a moment dancing with me.

It also made me laugh when Lee got too drunk and had to go home. He told us not to trust the man who worked at the club who had been looking after our table and to keep hold of our things the whole time after he left.

Lee told us at the beginning to trust the club worker with everything while we danced! 

Luckily, me and Natasha kept hold of our bags all night! He seemed nice enough, it was his job after all to look after us. But you can never be sure!

In Zhengzhou, it’s unusual to see foreigners, especially tall, ‘blonde’ white girls! So when people come up to me, I make their experience a good one! I smile and be polite. I feel so famous! haha!

I can’t wait for my next night out.

Food!

All the foreign teachers here say that at the beginning you lose weight because hardly anyone speaks English and everything is in Chinese characters and impossible to read. But by the end you will be fat because you gradually learn some Chinese and you eat lots and lots!

Since I’ve been here, my diet hasn’t been the best. I’ve eaten lots of rice, noodles, fruit, biscuits and a few McDonald’s!

There’s so much street food by where I live but I doubt I will ever eat from a street stall. Every Westerner I have spoken to who has eaten from street stalls has been ill. I don’t think I’ll be taking my chances, even if it smells so good when I walk by when I’m hungry!

Even ordering from McDonald’s is difficult. McDonald’s has a very different name in Chinese. McDonald’s in Chinese is ‘Màidāngláo.’ Everything is in Chinese characters and everything has a Chinese name. In China, chicken is ‘jī,’ hamburger is ‘hànbǎobao,’ Coca Cola is ‘Kělè,’ Sprite is ‘xuěbì’ and chips is ‘Shǔ tiáo.’ I’m only now learning the names for different food in Chinese. Luckily, McDonald’s has a menu and I’ve been pointing a lot!

 I’ve been told that the Chinese like to put sugar on their chips? I’ve had a few chips and I haven’t noticed anything different but I’m always a little suspicious and doubtful now whenever I order chips!

I’ve been invited out to dinner a few times by different teacher’s Chinese friends. Even when they have only just met me, they have invited me along to dine with them at expensive Chinese restaurants. The other teachers speak Chinese so they can translate for me.

The tables are usually round with a turning table in the middle. When the food arrives, it’s put on the turning table so that everyone can help themselves. There are always a number of different meats, vegetables, tofu and dumplings. They like to mix and match!

I’m still mastering using chopsticks. It’s so difficult! Typically though, I can use them perfectly well after a few cocktails!

In China, if someone invites you to eat or drink, they will pay for everything. If you protest and insist on paying, you offend them. They see this as a sign that you think that they cannot afford to pay for you! So I have had a fair few free dinners since arriving!

The Chinese food is obviously so different to the UK’s Chinese food! It’s very nice but some things take some getting used to! I’ve seen turtles on menus and I have seen fish in fish tanks in the restaurant ready to be killed and put on a plate. That’s what you call fresh food!

At the end of your meal in a Chinese restaurant, it is unheard of to leave a tip when you pay your bill! Again, they will take offence if you leave extra money!